For the past few days, a thought, a disturbing thought has been bombarding my mind again and again. What is the purpose of this blogging business? What I want to achieve here? Whom I want to address? What Iam doing here? Is it worth? Is it good? Does it not come under laqviyath? Am I wasting my precious time here?
These thoughts have grabbed my peace of mind. I feel like as they say in Tamil கண்ணை கட்டி காட்டில் விட்டது போல. I could not see anybody. I could hear any body. I could not feel the presence of anybody. This virtual world of internet is disturbing, annoying and very awkward.
And the most dangerous fear which seized my mind is that whether I have become a addict to this blog? Oh! It is horrible. I am not the person who could become addictive to anything on this earth. I do not smoke. I do not do any kind of addictive things. Even the chai too I could not say that I am addicted to it. I am a இலட்சியவாதி I have some ideals. I have some commitments. I have made some promises. I have dedicated my life for the sake of getting reward from God.
So I feel Iam a misfit here. I think the time has come to close this blog. I feel that this leads me nowhere.
I thank every body who read my posts and commented. I thank the disgruntled souls like dear brothers with fictitious names like mad mullah, mysore peshwa etc too! These dear brothers seem to have a lot of grudges, aversions and ill-will towards Islam and Indian Muslims. I would love to talk with them. I would love to spend time with them and clear their misconceptions regarding Islam and Muslims. But you see, this form of media does not suit me. I need a human face, a real living human face, a emotive face to communicate with. I cannot shout at darkness.
My heartfelt sympathies to those brothers mysore peshwa (who seem to be residing somewhere in America) and mad mullah (who seems to be residing in Bangalore). If Allah desires I would meet these gentleman and explain the real values of Islam, Insha Allah.
I thank Dr Khaleel Sahib for his thought provoking comments on some of my posts. Infact as I type these lines I received a mail from him cautioning me.
His words were:
You seem to be wandering everywhere in the web. You seem to have postings in more than one blog spot. There are plenty of postings of yours. Do you find time? How is your thafheem translation going on? When are you going to finish it?
Take care Internet is addictive.It may steal off your valued time. Most of your blogs have 0 comments. So think about the effectiveness of this media. In India I remember Reading that only 10% of the population has access to internet. Don't get carried away by number of hits.The same person can hit on you several times a day. Some may be searching for something else and stumble on you and immediately surf to other site.
You are right Doctor Sahib!
You have got it right.
I too have been thinking on those lines. 'Whether I have been addicted to blog?"
I resolved myself and didn't visit my blog for the past 58 hrs..! I saw your mail just now.
I have posted my goodbye post to you!
I will get back to blogging, if interest is there, after August.
Jazakallah for the concern and advice.
It is very touching.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
So goodbye everybody! Alvida!